The undefeated heart



Finding Clarity

March 5, 2020

“When the meaning is unclear there is no meaning.” Marty Rubin Clarity.  One of the most critical factors to reach your vision and goals………..and one of the hardest to achieve. I was listening to a Tony Robbins podcast on my way into work yesterday and he asked his listeners to get clear about 2 specific […]

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“When the meaning is unclear there is no meaning.” Marty Rubin

Clarity.  One of the most critical factors to reach your vision and goals………..and one of the hardest to achieve.

I was listening to a Tony Robbins podcast on my way into work yesterday and he asked his listeners to get clear about 2 specific goals that they want to achieve in the next 6 months.  SPECIFIC was the key word that he used.  I stopped, thought, fought, and then came completely undone.  I had one of the most authentic and real moments that I’ve had in a long time and it led me to, “I have no idea what my specific goals are.”

Now, goals are something that I typically LOVE.  I’m a big new year’s resolution person, I love the 1st of the month, the beginning of a school year, birthdays, anything to start anew with fresh ideas and well…..goals.  Lately however, this has started to change.  My goals have turned into these lofty dreams that I can’t seem to reach because I’m struggling to manage the day to day. Life is BUSY and for whatever reason the clarity that I need to set specific goals has gotten lost.  What has come out of this “fuzziness fog” is a daily struggle of trying to do everything and getting nowhere at all.

So that’s where I’m at currently.  Feeling lost, working hard than ever, and not clear as to what I really want.  Leadership is hard work y’all and in these times I go back to one of the most important tools in leadership development………Clarity. 

Developing clarity allows you to focus in on what matters most.  It removes the “going through the motions” feeling and allows you to see the process of what needs to be done. Clarity gives you direction, motivation, accountability, and a sense of purpose.  It sheds light on what matters so that your priorities overtake any distractions. In other words, if you want to bring your dreams to life, you need to spend time creating a clear path.

Regaining clarity is not easy, but it is absolutely essential to becoming a great leader and I hope that you will join me in working through the below steps to get clear on what you want, why you want it, and the impact that you want to create for the world.

  1. Get yourself in the right headspace.  When you’re super tired, emotional, angry etc. it’s hard to get clear about what’s most important.  Clarity development should come from a neutral or positive state centered upon hope, joy, and purpose rather than frustration, fear, or desperation.  There are countless ways to get in the right headspace including meditation, exercise, listening to music/podcast, journaling, talking to a friend, watching a ted talk, reading, spending time on a hobby you love, etc.   The important thing is that the activity should leave you feeling energized, present, and open to possibility.
  • Stop.Pause.Journal.  Once you’re in the right headspace – find stillness. Our days are in constant motion and taking the time to stop and sit with our thoughts is essential. Here’s how to do to this effectively:
    • Sit in a room with no technology or distractions
    • Let your thoughts consume you for a few minutes and then once you feel your monkey mind beginning to quiet, take 20 deeps belly breaths.  Keep your hands on your belly and your gaze on your hands as you watch your breath rise and fall.
    • Start to journal.  Write down the physical and mental feelings that you have surrounding the exercise and any “ah ha” moments that came to fruition. Then start to get specific by asking yourself the following questions:
      • What are your passions?
      • What are the 5 words that describe you when you are the best version of yourself?
      • Why do you want to be that person and how does that impact the world?
      • What will your life look like when you become this person?
  • Talk it Out.  I am a very private person in terms of my hopes and dreams and that always ends up hurting me for 3 specific reasons: 
  • People typically want to help so I miss out on opportunities and connections by staying quiet
  • Stating your goals out loud and talking through points of ambiguity with someone else will help you gain more perspective and clarity
  • Declaring your desires vocally to someone else provides and extra layer of accountability

Talking it out will push you toward your goals with the support of people that mean the most to you.

Clarity is not something that happens overnight.  It’s a process of spending time thinking and reflecting.  Oftentimes we get caught up in what we think we want or what we used to want, but that is different than what we actually want/need for ourselves and the world.  I encourage you to spend time this week getting in the right headspace, sitting in stillness, and talking your goals out with a trusted confidant.   The more that you can get clear on what you want, the greater chance you have to achieve your desired outcomes.  Ambiguity causes confusion and procrastination, clarity causes drive, purpose, and positive impact.  Let’s get clear on our goals together this week together and create an undefeated heart life!

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I'm Lauren and I can't wait to help you create the life you dreamed of.... and more! 

I am a working mom with 3 kids, 2 dogs, and an incredible husband just trying to figure it all out.  I am passionate about wellness, leadership, and changing the world for the better and I cannot wait to go on this journey with you! 

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